BRBGGP
by Brighid0708
Summary: Jack's favorite button of all. An IM chat found in Major Carter's desktop recycle bin.


**BRBGGP**

I, Brighid own nothing of Stargate SG-1. I just like to play in their world every once in a while. I am also a J/S shipper. Like it or don't, I don't care.

Summery: An IM chat log that was found on Major Carter's computer. Crackfic

**Xphish**: So I just type like I am talking to you?

**me**: yes, but I'm not talking to u

sir

**Xphish**: What did I do?

**me**: you pushed the button

**Xphish**: You told me it was safe to push the button

**me**: I never

**Xphish**: you did

**me**: I did not!

sir

**Xphish**: What did you say Carter?

Huuuuuuuuuuuuummmmmmmmmmm?

**me**: I said, "Sir, the button may be tempting, but please don't touch it or we could end up in a very bad situation"

and then U touched it

**Xphish**: No.

**me**: Sir?

**Xphish**: That is not what you said

**me**: OK, then what did I say?

**Xphish**: You said, The button is tempting blah blah scientist stuff push it

**me**: ..................no, sir.

switch that last stuff with DO NOT

and they you may be on to something

**Xphish**: Carter.

**me**: Sir?

**Xphish**: You told me to push it

you made a side bet with Daniel about me pushing it

And T

**me**: Sir, with all due respect, I really do not want to talk to you right now. I would not be stuck here, in this little room if you hadn't pushed the button after EVERY ONE OF US said not to!

and I made no such bet!

**Xphish**: So it was a dream and I imagined it. Carter, I may imagine a lot about you in my dreams but this was not one of them

**me**: :-o

**Xphish**: errr

eh

ha ha

**me**: uh, yeah

**Xphish**: yeah

**me**: lol

**Xphish**: lol?

**me**: it means laugh out loud, sir

as in, ha ha I'm laughing and you can't hear me

although some times people aren't actually laughing

more like, they're saying haha, funny....

yeah

**Xphish**: yeah

so

lol then

**me**: yeah...uh sir, brbggp

**Xphish**: brbggp??

11:37 AM Carter??

11:39 AM Heeeeeeeeeeeellllllllllloooooooooooo

what the hell is brbggp??

**me**: sorry, sir....I uh

**Xphish**: what??

**me**: I told you i had to go pee

be right back

gotta go p...

**Xphish**: too much information there Carter. Too much

**me**: well that's why you just say brbggp

**Xphish**: ah

**me**: yeah

**Xphish**: yeah

**me**: so, what are you doing to entertain yourself?

They won't let me have any of my research to work on

mostly because SOMEBODY touched the button

**Xphish**: YOU told ME to touch the button

and well right now I am typing to you

**me**: WTF SIR????????????

**Xphish**: WTF?

**me**: I did no such thing!

And WTF = What the....use your imagination

and technically you're IMing me

**Xphish**: Carter!

**me**: **innocent face**

sir?

**Xphish**: brbggp

ha!

I can get the hang of this

**me**: have fun, sir

.....

oh, and while ur using the facilities, I'd just like to use this time to say, I TOLD YOU NOT TO PUSH THE BUTTON to Infinity. I win. :P

**Xphish**: :p ?

WTH is :p ?

**me**: wth sir? You do catch on quickly

and :P is a tongue

**Xphish**: ok

ok

You are sticking your tongue out at me?

**me**: who me?

idk

maybe

**Xphish**: idk? I don't know?

**me**: VERY GOOD SIR!

Still surprised u didn't catch the tongue quicker though

**Xphish**: Yes... well... if I can't keep my finger off of a button that you told me to push, how would I get that a P was a tongue?

**me**: I thought you had a more vivid imagination than most....

ok, that came out wrong

**Xphish**: Yeah... I think it did

**me**: hehe

whoops

sooooooooooooooooo

what's new with you?

wait, i'm not talking to you

**Xphish**: Ah but you are

**me**: am not

**Xphish**: yes you are

**me**: nope

**shakes head**

enter **Gat8erboi**

**G8terboi:** Are you two still arguing over the button?

**Xphish**: Finally, a voice of reason! Daniel did Sam tell me to push the button?

**G8terboi**: No.

**Xphish**: WTH?

She did!

**G8terboi**: Sam, have you been teaching Jack IM lingo?

**me**: Um..guilty

**Xphish**: I couldn't figure it out on my own?

Thanks for the vote of confidence

**G8terboi**: Well, obviously you couldn't figure out that when we said don't touch we meant DON"T TOUCH.....

enter **sXeT**

**Xphish****: **Carter told me to push the button!

**sXeT**: I believe Major/Colonel Carter told you NOT to push the button O'Neill

**Xphish**: et tu Teal'c?

**G8terboi**: Admit it Jack, we've got u on this 1.

**Xphish**: Scientific blah blah push the button blah blah

**me**: See what I've been putting up with?

**Xphish**: And I don't want any tongue sticking out from either one of you too!

I mean it

**sXeT**: My tongue will remain in my mouth O'Neill

:P

**Xphish**: lol

**G8terboi**: Sam, I hold you accountable for him knowing this stuff now

**me**: He told me to tell him!

**Xphish**: It was an order

**G8terboi**: was it?

**Xphish**: wink

**me**: actually.............it wasn't

**sXeT**: I believe that is a ;)

**G8terboi**: It wasn't an order? Then why would u tell him????

**me**: I couldn't help it!!!!

**Xphish**: She can't resist me

and now if that wasn't inappropriate

**sXeT**: 4real

**G8terboi**: seriously

**me**: I'm going to hell

**Xphish**: because you are a liar

you told me to push the button

**me**: Sir, seriously

W

T

F

?

It's 3 against 1 here.

Sir?

Sir?

**G8terboi**: Sam, I think u hurt his feelings.

**sXeT**: Indeed

**Xphish**: :p

**me**: Sir, r u mad me?

**Xphish**: why in the world would I be mad at you?

You just have convinced the others that I did something you told me to do

**G8terbi**: Because she broke your 3

**Xphish**: SHE BROKE MY WHAT?

????

**sXeT**: Major Carter has broken your heart O'Neill

**G8terboi**: Oh boy

**me**: Thank you Teal'c

**sXeT**: U r welcome

**Xphish**: what is with all this symbol and one letter.... things

you don't type anything out?

**G8terboi**: Sorry, it's uh...IM it means Instant Message...it's more instant when you don't have to type out EVERY SINGLE WORD

seriously Jack, where did u get your screen name if you didn't know that?

**Xphish**: That was for my email

besides Carter did it

Because Carter does a lot of things

**G8terboi**: She did did she?

**SxeT**: what kinds of things O'Neill?

**Xphish**: Yes Daniel she does. Like sets up an email address so I don't get junk mail in my real one

tells me to push buttons

those kind of things

**me**: I DID NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sir!

And I kinda have to do what he says sometimes guys

**Xphish**: Yes, the power I wield over her

lol

**me**: but he obviously doesn't do what I tell HIM to do, like pushing buttons and getting us all locked into separate cells until the effects of crazy alien junk wears off!!!!!!!!!!

**Xphish**: For the last time

MAJOR

you told me to push the button

**me**: and for the last time SIR, what I said was....

as we stood by the machine, don't push the button!

**Xphish**: Fine Carter, fine.

**me**: thank you sir

**Xphish**: But I wasn't talking about that time

**G8terboi**: Uh Sam...?

**me**: Sir?

um.........what time are you talking about?

exactly?

**Xphish**: I don't push your buttons?

**me**: ***gulps*** Sir...

**Xphish**: What?

**me**: Oh....no.........no no no no

**sXeT**: is everything alright Major Carter?

**G8terboi**: Sam?

**me**: Oh no no no no

no

no

***headdesk***

**Xphish**: Carter?

**me**: ***headdesk***

no

no

no

i didn't

no

i couldn't............

**Xphish**: Carter? WTH is the matter with you?

**me**: Sir?

nothing

:D

just...thinking

**G8erboi**: About?

**me**: nothing

nothing at all

I really should use this time to do some research online...I g/g

ttyl guys!

**Xphish**: gg?

**me**: gotta go...

**Xp****hish**: ttyl?

**me**: talk to you latter

**Xphish**: ah

**me**: bye sir

**Xphish**: Carter, wait

That's an order

Major

**me**: Sir?

:S

**G8terboi**: Sam' what's going on?

IDK!, Sir?

**Xphish**: Carter...you're in an awful big hurry to get out of here, would you like to share something with the class?

**me**: No, sir, not really....

**Xphish**: Carter....

**me**: Sir?

:D

**Xphish: …....**

**me:**Oh for crying out loud SIR! That time didn't count!

**Xphish**: It does

**me**: doesn't

**Xphish**: does

**me**: doesn't!

doesn't!

**G8terboi**: WTF you guys?

**Xphish**: does to infinity

ha! I win

**me**: Damn

**Xphish**: lol

**me**: I'm not laughing sir

**G8terboi**: Sam, what is going on?

Jack?

**Xphish**: Spill it Carter. I am sure that Daniel and T are on the edge of their seat

**sXeT**: I am actually seated comfortably on a 3 seat O'Neill

**me**: guys....i may have kinda sorta said...........

**Xphish**: To push the button

**me**: not in so many words

**G8terboi**: Sam you didn't!!!!!!!!!!

**me**: It was an accident Daniel! And totally out of context!

**Xphish**: See! I listen to her.

**G8terboi**: What exactly did you tell him?

**Xphish**: Yes Carter, what exactly did you tell me?

**me**: Sir...now really isn't the time is it?

Look guys, I'm sorry, but I may have inadvertently given Colonel O'Neill permission to push the button

**sXeT**: Major Carter, I am shocked

**G8terboi**: ditto

**me**: ACCIDENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Xphish**: NOT STUPID

I LISTEN

**G8terboi**: ***shakes head*** Sam...

**me**: Sorry guys....

**sXeT**: Upon that note i believe i will now be needing to Kelnoreem, ttyl

**G8terboi**: yeah, i got some stuff to think about too

**Xphish**: Bye guys

**me**: yeah bye

Sir, you still there?

**Xphish**: yes

**me**: guys????

Teal'c?

Daniel?

**Xphish**: I think we're alone

**me**: Sir you know that didn't count!

**Xphish**: oh didn't it?

**me**: Sir when I said you always have permission to push my buttons, i didn't mean the literal ones!

**Xphish**: But you did say to push the button Carter

me: urgh

**Xphish**: So then what did you say????

**me**: You aren't letting this go are u?

**Xphish**: Nope

**me**: Fine

Sir, I actually rather enjoy it when you try and push my buttons.

And then you said, can I push it now

and I said, feel free

**G8terboi**: Oh God, I did not hear that

**me**: DANIEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Xphish**: DANIEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**G8terboi**: Sorry, i meant to say brbggp


End file.
